N965VJ
Veteran
Can I get a LODO here?
Anyway, I’ve always wanted to learn just enough of a foreign language so I could pretend to not speak English when people ask me stupid questions.
So far I have:
Coupe deville eldorado biarritz sedan deville.
I just worked with a former "EAST" F/A - Many topics
- Thread starter TheNewLowFare
- Start date
Can I get a LODO here?
Anyway, I’ve always wanted to learn just enough of a foreign language so I could pretend to not speak English when people ask me stupid questions.
So far I have:
Coupe deville eldorado biarritz sedan deville.
USCREW
Veteran
Tres TRES bien VJ. Vous etes tres intelligent et sympa. Je suis heureux que vous voulez etre LODO avec moi.
USCREW
Veteran
VJ, I said the speedo suits you.
What will they do when they fly with those of us who wear five different flags on our lapel? They'll think that they are at the U.N.
US1YFARE
Veteran
- Mar 31, 2004
- 3,932
- 54
I couldn't see his speedo with his belly hanging over. Can someone please bring me 2 more minis? and the WHOLE can of tonic water please?? And a lime and ice wouldn't hurt either. Since I PAID for this FC seat, I would like double my ice ration. Now, where is that barf bag, I need the number for PF Changs.
USCREW
Veteran
N965VJ
Veteran
Look at this. My chain is making my neck turn green. I just bought it on my last long LGA. I really miss the pre-Giuliani street vendors.
Friggin’ Giuliani!
I still have the fake Rolex I bought on Fifth Ave. from a guy who had a whole briefcase of them. I’m going to switch from the Radio Shack digital watch I wear on the plane before I go down to the bar tonight.
I’ll be so Money.
Friggin’ Giuliani!
I still have the fake Rolex I bought on Fifth Ave. from a guy who had a whole briefcase of them. I’m going to switch from the Radio Shack digital watch I wear on the plane before I go down to the bar tonight.
I’ll be so Money.
That's because we have a certain FED as our CSI, and she is very well known for being by the book. She has fined us for not reciting the exit seat ritual verbatum,she has fined us for having PENCIL MARKS in our manuals, she has fined us for stepping ONE STEP past overwing, and she has fined us for earmarking a page in our manuals. So, yes, we are by the book, because we have had the fear of GOD instilled in us since her arrival in Phoenix. Rumor has it, she will not be our CSI for much longer. Can we breathe yet?
Sthrnboy
Senior
Yes.... SHE has put the FEAR of GOD in all in PHX/LAS..... She has flown with me thank GOD and I came out all great... Even served her a meal up in the flight deck...
So I have no beef with her or anything but have known people to Drop and faint with just her name spoken... h34r: h34r: h34r:The whole East Vs. West theme is so trite.
The majority of the employees I work with at HP are stellar, as are the majority of staff I have met and become friends with at US.
From the FA perspective there is definately an air of paranoia at HP. So many FAs are worried all the time about getting written up. HP InFlight Management (I use that term loosely) and Training are the kings of micromanaging. They have all these people sitting in cubes making up policies and procedures that are completely ridiculous. From my perspective, they take the FAR, make it 10 times more restrictive/ridiculous, then apply it to the IOM where it stands as the law of the land.
Having a chain smoking dinosaur of an FAA cabin safety inspector on the ultimate power trip just adds to this equation of absurd policy and uptight FAs. If you didn't already know, the position of Cabin Safety Inspector places just one step above the position of Toilet Cleaner at the FAA in OKC, among FAA employees. They're the butt of jokes of the employees there, the also-ran of the FAA if you will. Anyway...
HP is as far from PSA as Air France. <_<
Some examples:
The "notification of the location of the FD door" announcement. I'd like to meet the puke in the legal department that came up with this one. Actually, ALL of the announcements are lame. They expect us to bark into the PA from block out to block in. The required announcements are far from concise and are full of grammatical errors.
The "verbatim" exit row briefing. They require we read this verbatim. It creates tension between the FA and PAX, and makes us look like morons. Let the FA use common sense. If someone shows up for the exit row in a body cast, reseat them. Japanese tourist that can't speak english, reseat them. Why pester the FF Elite who usually sit there though?
Stepping past the OW Exit during flight. We have actually had FAs written up for this at HP! Written up and then suspended...absurd! The FD Door is like a bank vault. If someone is (God forbid) intent on getting in, my scrawny ass sitting on the FWD J/S reading "The Week" is not going to stop them.
The InFlight Cafe service flow in YC is completely ineffecient. At HP, we are required to do a beverage service first. The entire time the PAX are asking for InFlight Cafe. We have to say no, wait for that service, it's later. Then, during the InFlight Cafe service all of my PAX want more to drink. Again, we must say no. All we have is food and water/coffee now. Who makes this sh*t up? I feel like David Spade on a Capital One commercial...no no no, no no, no no no...Push/Pull ala US is the only way to go. It's best for the PAX and easier for the FA. The old KISS theory.
The minimum staffing requirement for boarding/deplaning. We have a 6 leg day with 30 minute turns on full 320s all day. We can't step off to grab food. At WN, they can...again, it's HP management tweaking the FARs for whatever reason. Let's use some common sense here. One FA stepping of for a few minutes is not a safety issue.
The culture is messed up. You can't blame all of the FAs for being so uptight, it's the culture! It's how they were trained to be, and how they feel they must act in order to avoid the wrath of InFlight. The culture breeds such paranoia, you end up with these FAs who feel they are police officers, all about the FARs, all about enforcing policy.
But not all of us at HP are that way. You'll find many of us are easy going, who know this job is just that, a job. It does not define me. It is not who I am.
I just hope that the new US retains some of the "chill" attitude of the old US and most of the policies and procedures for InFlight as well...
Policy aside, the whole East Vs. West issue troubles me the most because it is just what management wants. So many of us feed on it. The really pressing issue for me is US all standing together for a fair contract. If we're divided we risk not getting the best contract we can.
We've got to be all about Unity.
The majority of the employees I work with at HP are stellar, as are the majority of staff I have met and become friends with at US.
From the FA perspective there is definately an air of paranoia at HP. So many FAs are worried all the time about getting written up. HP InFlight Management (I use that term loosely) and Training are the kings of micromanaging. They have all these people sitting in cubes making up policies and procedures that are completely ridiculous. From my perspective, they take the FAR, make it 10 times more restrictive/ridiculous, then apply it to the IOM where it stands as the law of the land.
Having a chain smoking dinosaur of an FAA cabin safety inspector on the ultimate power trip just adds to this equation of absurd policy and uptight FAs. If you didn't already know, the position of Cabin Safety Inspector places just one step above the position of Toilet Cleaner at the FAA in OKC, among FAA employees. They're the butt of jokes of the employees there, the also-ran of the FAA if you will. Anyway...
HP is as far from PSA as Air France. <_<
Some examples:
The "notification of the location of the FD door" announcement. I'd like to meet the puke in the legal department that came up with this one. Actually, ALL of the announcements are lame. They expect us to bark into the PA from block out to block in. The required announcements are far from concise and are full of grammatical errors.
The "verbatim" exit row briefing. They require we read this verbatim. It creates tension between the FA and PAX, and makes us look like morons. Let the FA use common sense. If someone shows up for the exit row in a body cast, reseat them. Japanese tourist that can't speak english, reseat them. Why pester the FF Elite who usually sit there though?
Stepping past the OW Exit during flight. We have actually had FAs written up for this at HP! Written up and then suspended...absurd! The FD Door is like a bank vault. If someone is (God forbid) intent on getting in, my scrawny ass sitting on the FWD J/S reading "The Week" is not going to stop them.
The InFlight Cafe service flow in YC is completely ineffecient. At HP, we are required to do a beverage service first. The entire time the PAX are asking for InFlight Cafe. We have to say no, wait for that service, it's later. Then, during the InFlight Cafe service all of my PAX want more to drink. Again, we must say no. All we have is food and water/coffee now. Who makes this sh*t up? I feel like David Spade on a Capital One commercial...no no no, no no, no no no...Push/Pull ala US is the only way to go. It's best for the PAX and easier for the FA. The old KISS theory.
The minimum staffing requirement for boarding/deplaning. We have a 6 leg day with 30 minute turns on full 320s all day. We can't step off to grab food. At WN, they can...again, it's HP management tweaking the FARs for whatever reason. Let's use some common sense here. One FA stepping of for a few minutes is not a safety issue.
The culture is messed up. You can't blame all of the FAs for being so uptight, it's the culture! It's how they were trained to be, and how they feel they must act in order to avoid the wrath of InFlight. The culture breeds such paranoia, you end up with these FAs who feel they are police officers, all about the FARs, all about enforcing policy.
But not all of us at HP are that way. You'll find many of us are easy going, who know this job is just that, a job. It does not define me. It is not who I am.
I just hope that the new US retains some of the "chill" attitude of the old US and most of the policies and procedures for InFlight as well...
Policy aside, the whole East Vs. West issue troubles me the most because it is just what management wants. So many of us feed on it. The really pressing issue for me is US all standing together for a fair contract. If we're divided we risk not getting the best contract we can.
We've got to be all about Unity.
Why would anyone even put a PENCIL mark in your manual? Noone writes in that! The stepping past the over wing exit is just pain ol' stupid. It really is..dumb. I hope whoever made that one up over there feels just as dumb for thinking it up. That wont fly over here. Noone will let that happen. You can count on that one. Our union will laugh at that one(they probably already are laughing)..and again why would anyone earmark a manual? Out of all the manuals I have seen on the east I have never seen anyone with one that had something wrong with it other than the cover falling apart. You are told during training never to do anything or put anything in it. Period.
OP
TheNewLowFare
Senior
- Aug 31, 2005
- 394
- 0
- Thread Starter
- Thread starter
- #267
I AGREE!!!!! Inflight has put alot of fear on the F/A's that I can't believe our union even agreed some of the policies. Some of them are just way too ridiculuos!! I can't wait for the east/west policies to be integrated and maybe some of the ridiculous rules will change.
IMisstheAladdinTrays
Veteran
Yeah I was like WTF when I flew HP to Alaska a Few months ago. And they must have said 200 times its water or coffe only now.
USCREW
Veteran
When my manual comes back from the shop (it's being repaired for total neglect), I'll have to start making many notes in it, and high-lighting, and ear-marking, and sticking post-its, and...
IMisstheAladdinTrays
Veteran
yeah the evacuation commands alone take up 2 chapters!
